Monday, 3 October 2011

Greenlight Crit - repost

Greenlight Crit


  1. I'm also keen on the idea that modern metamorphism tends to be parasitic encounters, like in The Cave, Slither and Alien films where the creature takes characteristics of the host or transforms the host.

  2. OGR 03/10/11

    Hey Jake,

    You know, I can't help suspecting that your super-imposing a pre-existing enjoyment of all things monstrous (the Alien/Predator etc). onto something that has a completely different energy. Yes, you make the argument that your gene-splice may not be integrated, leaving you in a 'body-horrible' condition, but honestly, Jake - is the platypus really the best subject for a David Cronenberg-style treatment? Put another way, this would never make a horror film. As I think I suggested earlier, there is something wonderfully whimsical and light-hearted about this most improbable of animals and to stubbornly pursue a direction that vanishes all the inherent attributes of your animal would, I think be perverse and a wasted opportunity. I'd like to see you pursue alternate lines of enquiry and influences. You may decide to return to this first position, but I think you need to love your animal more and properly engage with it. I suspect you wish you had something more immediately 'horrible' or something more 'cool' - but do you know what, as a creative, you need to find enthusiasm and innovation come what may, and certainly, as a freelancer you need to engage productively with anything that comes your way - even if it's a duck-billed platypus! Go for a softer, more melancholy approach - make us feel sympathy and affection for your hybrid-self - and ensure that your own semblance survives.

    Now, I could spend valuable time feeding back on your introduction, but that would only annoy me, because much of what I'd write in response to what is wrong about it I've already written in the Rough Guide to Written Assignments available on myUCA/Anatomy/Unit Materials/Writing resources. Please go directly to the 'Style Guide', which will very quickly make you aware of what you'll need to change in terms of your opening paragraph, and then I want you to actually take the time to read the example essay for Unit 1 that the Rough Guide provides too. Please - use this stuff, it's to stop you wasting your time (and mine) by going about things the wrong way needlessly. The general ballpark - animal hybrids and religion - is fine, but please take the time to do what you're asked. Also - on the brief, under 'written assignment' there is a helpful criteria which states very clearly what your introduction MUST contain in order to BE an introduction.

    When you've done your bit, re-post a new introduction, and I'll do my bit.

  3. Cheers for the feedback Phil, ill redo my introduction and repost the Greenlight crit, i have already thought of a cool idea for the hybrid. I shall do some more initial ideas of it and post it tomorrow. And i guess I'm falling back on what i like and enjoy and thank you for pointing me in the right direction.